June 24, 2008
Hey man,
I couldn’t sleep the other night. I had been working with a guy all day… a guy who had been in the “Community” for a long time. Something he said was gnawing on my nerves but I couldn’t put my finger on what was bothering me…
Then, suddenly I leapt up in bed and ran to my computer. I looked at the clock. Three in the morning. I didn’t care. I had to get this down while it was so burning me up.
For the last few years, this guy had referred to women as a “set”… or as an “HB9”… or as a “target”. He was having difficulty really connecting with women and really didn’t know any different because that is what he had been taught.
Now, I’ve talked before about I hate terms from the “community”. But, the other night it really hit home how destructive such language can be (even to guys just starting out).
When you use such artificial language, you cannot… I repeat CANNOT… connect with women on a deep level. Even if they never hear you use the term, they can see in your presence and how you are looking at them that you consider them just another number or as an object.
The sad truth is that I’ve met tons of guys who use this language and all it does is end up making them look… well… creepy.
OK well I have a lot of guys asking me what creepy looks like. Well it is simply an uncomfortable stare that one does if he is looking at human being as an object or with his left brain. Almost as if he was staring at someone like he wanted to kill them. The sad part of this is that many guys are doing it and they don’t even realize it and what’s even worst than that is that no one is going to tell you that you have that look about you. You will continue to do it and continue to make people feel uncomfortable around you. Many guys that have come through my boot camps have had this look and they didn’t even know it, they were blown away when I pointed it out. The good part is that I do know how to correct it so there is no more going out and making people feel uncomfortable around you.
It is simply creepy…There’s no better word to describe it.
Okay, here’s an example of what I’m talking about…
Remember Ted Bundy, the psycho-killer? When he was torturing a victim, he looked at her like an object… not a person. He never referred to them by name because if he did, it would bring out emotions and feelings within him. If he got emotionally involved he would not be able to continue with the torture. He completely justified everything with the left (or “rational”) side of his brain. If you look at pictures of Ted Bundy you will see that blank (creepy) stare in him.
Now, don’t get all bent out of shape here. I know that members of the “community” are NOT psycho-killers like Bundy. That’s not what I’m saying at all.
But on a much milder level, can you see the similarities of using subtle language that allows you to “detach” from reality or your emotional state?
Here’s another example:
A detective who investigates murder cases must refer to the person who was killed as a “case number”. If the detective gets too emotionally involved, he or she will become too “close” to the victim… even though the victim is already dead. If the detective allows him- or herself to become emotionally involved, there is a greater chance he or she will mess up the investigation.
So, when you refer to women as a SET or a DB1f7 or a TARGET, you’re basically turning them into an object. You cannot connect on a deep level with an object. It’s impossible.
And the worst part is that most guys do this even BEFORE they talk to a woman they’re attracted to. Even BEFORE the first word is spoken, the possibility of having a real connection with her is shot to hell.
She is a HUMAN BEING… not an object.
This is why it’s so important to be the kind of man who loves women… and I really mean LOVES women. A man who wants that deep connection that we all so yearn for. A man who knows how to lose himself in that incredible bond or connection that two people share through their eyes and souls when they meet. That unexplainable feeling when you look a girl in her eyes and just know.
The only way to do this is to be open to seeing women as the truly beautiful human beings that they are… and being willing to connect with them on a very deep emotional level.
And it goes beyond women. Having this mentality of people as objects, you will never be able to experience a true connection with another human being in general. You will continue to have that creepy look about you, and you will never find true comfort within yourself. There will always be something missing. You will always be looking for the next best thing… the “missing link” to your elusive happiness.
But this “missing link” is nothing but finding your true self. And finding your true self means you have to get rid of all the internal garbage, negative thoughts, and old beliefs.
You need to bring out the best in yourself.
Every man has a deep masculine sexuality within him. All you need to do is awaken it and express it to the world. That is what I help all of my guys do.
If you’d like a shortcut to such an awakening, check out my audio program Magnetic Mindset here: http://www.badboywithaheart.com/mindset
This set of 3 CD’s is the pure distillation of the essence of a man who proudly walks the world knowing that he can create deep emotional connections wherever he goes.
I’ve done it since I was twelve and I can show you how. Magnetic Mindset is the best place to start your life changing process.
It’s chock-full of exercises that I PERSONALLY USE to bring out the best in me. I swear by it and the guys I coach are finding their lives to be changing thanks to using them.
I have said it before, the decision is yours!
You can have an abundance of women in your life, it is possible but you have to take the first step.
“Weekend Boot Camp”
My July boot camp is coming up soon and I still have a few spots open.
If you have been thinking of taking one I recommend that you jump on this opportunity.
As of now this is going to be the last boot camp in the US until 2009.
If you are interested, shoot me an email at: coryskyy@badboywithaheart.com
If you sign up now I will give you 3 hours of phone coaching FREE!
This is going to be another Kick A** weekend! I hope to see you there
Sign up NOW before this opportunity is gone
If you would like to read what others have to say about the boot camps go to:
www.coryskyy.com
I am also offering 50% OFF on 1 day of personal coaching with me the day after the boot camp. This is a great opportunity to really clarify and take home what you learned through out the weekend and allows us to focus more on your personal issues that are holding you back.
